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April 19, 2011 / allyo

Subconscious speaks

Last night I had one of those long, convoluted dreams that seem to go on forever, and when I woke up two things stayed with me. The first thing was Cory. He was tooling around the house and I was like, oh, THERE you are! Where have you been? The second was that my step-mom stopped by unexpectedly (which she’d never do) and was horrified by how dirty our house was (it is, but I remember their house being pretty dirty when my sibs were one so I doubt she’d say anything). And I offered her some chocolate chip cookies and they were soggy.

Cory’s a no-brainer. We’re going through one of our waves of missing him and talking about him a lot and that dog? I will always miss him. He was our once in a lifetime dog and I’m just grateful that he was stubborn enough to stick around until Jamie was old enough to remember him. Cory WAS the first member of the family to know I was pregnant so it’s only fitting. (He started sleeping in bed w/me shortly after we conceived and continued to do so until we brought Jamie home.)

The house thing, it could be that a dirty house is really JUST a dirty house or it could be the constant unknowing hanging over our heads. And my stepmom ALWAYS calls me out on shit I wish she’d just let lie, and her role fits with either scenario.

Stupid flickr. Where is my picture?

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