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November 19, 2008 / allyo

Two people, one body

We had another LOVELY morning this morning but on the upside the only person yelling was Jamie. It took Mad Dog about 25 minutes to get Jamie into his clothes. I’m not sure what set him off, but I think it started with his frustration about the snot in his nose. He doesn’t like being told that he has a cold and the big thing about having a cold is not being able to breathe. And if you insist on telling him this he gets increasingly agitated, tells you to “STOP TELLING ME THAT” and eventually orders you to “GET OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW.” As I may have found out last night. And I may or may not have pushed him a little bit because sometimes it’s fun to push HIS buttons. How does that feel, HUH?

Anyway, back to this morning. I try to leave the house at 8:25, which gets me to work before anyone else and gives me a chance to pull myself together for the day. Most days lately it’s closer to 8:35, which gets me to the office on time, which isn’t so bad. But I realized that I actually check out mentally at 8:00. It’s hard for me to go back and forth between mom and employee. I have actually found that I am more patient with Jamie the more time I spend with him. I get into a groove that way. So that half hour before I leave, any intrusion bugs me. The whining that I’d normally blow off or laugh my way through, MD trying to talk to me, it grates on me. Until I get into my car all I can think of is escape. This morning Jamie was screaming for me and MD was managing it, but he did take exception to me telling him that I just didn’t care that Jamie wanted me. He was like, but you’re his mom! And I was like, and I am also an employee whose job is driving her nuts and it is time for me to think about that instead! (To his credit I think he understood.)

I don’t think there’s anything to do except be aware and focus and stay out of morning altercations, like I did today. Schedule-wise my option is to get in the shower as soon as I get up so that I’m not trying to dry my hair while Jamie’s on the toilet pitching a fit because a) he can’t breathe and b) he doesn’t want to wipe his own butt. But getting into the cold, dark shower at 6:30 isn’t any more appealing. Heh.

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3 Comments

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  1. MystikMomma / Nov 19 2008 1:18 pm

    Had a thought… what about making the second bathroom your place to do your morning routine? Hubbie takes the second bathroom to himself, so that he isn’t in our way and we are not in his. It might help to remove yourself physically in the morning to a space that allows you to be you and do your thing? An idea, not certain if feasible.

    Another thought.. the fact that you realize the areas of frustration and how you can identify all the triggers for each of you, is a huge step in getting through it. You know the cause, effect and solutions. You may not be able to emplore the best strategies in the given situation, but you are able to identify, then move on. I think this is a large part of getting a handle on it all. I applaud your willingness to delve into this aspect of your life so honestly.

  2. LittleWit / Nov 19 2008 4:33 pm

    Hopefully once the morning routine is fully established it won’t be as grating. You could also sneak out of the house at 8am and just sit in your car or sleep at work. Not that I have ever driven to work early enough to take 20 min naps and snag a good parking spot. Nope not me.

  3. antropologa / Nov 21 2008 9:34 am

    Right–maybe relocation? That’s the luxury of more-than-one-bathroom!

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