My adoption triad: My mother

I’m not sure how to approach this point on the triangle. I’ve written so much about my mom here. Just check out my archives from last July and August. It’s been almost a year since she died and I am in a completely different place now that started with me realizing (or re-remembering) that once [...]

Read Full Post »

My adoption triad: Part 1 (updated with links)

Just writing that title feels a little funny. I never thought of my story as part of the adoption narrative, but ages ago when Dawn and I were talking, she made a comment about kinship adoption being especially difficult because of the pre-existing relationships. Especially in a case like mine, where the adoptive mother was [...]

Read Full Post »

Still waters

Jamie was getting a very stern talking to about running around in the parking lot the other day when out of the blue he asked, “Was Great-grandma O running around in a parking lot and got hit by a car and that is why she died?” Ok, first, I will admit that I giggled at [...]

Read Full Post »

Projecting

Like many of my better post, this is indirectly inspired by a post of Dawn’s. I’m going to paraphrase my comment there over here to begin. Basically she’s talking about how her own experiences as a child are affecting a (good) transition, and even more so because the age of her oldest child corresponds to [...]

Read Full Post »

Not an uplifting post

I ran across a note from my mom the other day. Her familiar handwriting was shaky and it was during the time after my grandma’s death when her own health finally gave out in a big way and she was moving around different health care facilities. She never called me during this time but she [...]

Read Full Post »

At my grandma’s funeral mass last Friday, images from my childhood flashed before my eyes. There were of sunshine and backyard picnics, cousins running through her house and teaming up to face her wicked, wicked cat. They were of warmth, love, and safety.
My childhood wore two faces. There was privilege. Not excess, just comfortable, middle [...]

Read Full Post »

Eulogy

My grandma died about an hour ago. She waited for my uncle to make it up from Virginia last night, same as my grandpa. Which I think is really fascinating.
I have a picture from our wedding that has my grandma and her children – my dad, my aunts, and my uncle. They are standing under [...]

Read Full Post »

What’s on my mind

Moxie and her readers tackle two big things on my mind at the moment: Q&A: 4-year-old and death. Read the comments. They’re great as always and I’ve got one there as well. I’ll talk about this more here, but not today because between not getting much sleep last night, crying at my grandma’s this morning, [...]

Read Full Post »

My grandma is declining, but slowly, and I went by yesterday to spend some time with her. I ended up helping my aunt shift her around in the bed and figured out that since she was having a hard time swallowing water, maybe ice chips would be something nice. She sucked down several spoonfuls of [...]

Read Full Post »

My Grandma O cried yesterday when it was time for her to leave my dad’s. It was a miracle that she was there. She had taken a turn for the worse right before Thanksgiving and we thought she would be gone before Christmas. But she wasn’t. Through sheer determination I think. She arrived at my [...]

Read Full Post »